Cruz Warns ‘Democrats Might Be Allowed to Count Every Vote’ if For the People Act Passes

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Senate Republicans are quite nervous as a group about the For the People Act, which is the first real attempt Congress has made to restore the Voting Rights Act of 1968 that was gutted by the Supreme Court during the Obama administration. The GOP has continuously assailed the act as federal overreach and blatant partisanship.

Today, the Senate Rules Committee began the markup and amendment phase of the For the People Act, which brought out the kinds of political debate and rancor one might expect. Unsurprisingly, Senator Ted Cruz (Q-Cancun) attempted, with his fellow Senate Republicans to drastically alter the bill with their proposed amendments, most of which failed to pass. During a break in the hearing, Cruz told reporters outside the room that he was “nervous and quite worried” about what would happen if the For the People Act passes into law.

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“Well, I can tell you that from the conversations I’m having with the people I abandoned to go traipsing off the Mexico during a brutal cold snap when many were literally freezing in their homes,” Cruz said with the tone of a preacher on Sunday, “there are a lot of people in this country mortified that the Democrats will ram this radical defense of the right to vote down everyone’s throats.”

Cruz accused Democrats of trying to “game the system in order to force every American’s vote to count.”

“Obviously, the Democrats have determined, probably by using some Woke Cancel Culture Antifa-sponsored focus group,” Cruz continued, “that in a world where people simply cast votes and those votes are counted, no matter what, they win. We Republicans are the ones defending the vote by ensuring only the voters with trustworthy credentials and skin pigmentation have their votes counted.”

Sen. Cruz warned Americans that if Democrats succeed in passing the For the People’s Act, they could have “unprecedented abilities to add numbers together.”

“Maybe we should be looking at making math illegal to secure the vote. Maybe we should make it against the law to allow Democrats to count anything at all,” Cruz suggested. “At any rate, Democrats might be allowed to count every vote recklessly if they get their way, and I hope Americans are paying close attention.

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Writer/comedian James Schlarmann is the founder of The Political Garbage Chute and his work has been featured on The Huffington Post. You can follow James on Facebook, Spotify, and Instagram, but not Twitter because Twitter is a cesspool.